2013-05-11 20.40.27 As wedding season approaches, I became curious to see if my friends decided to change their name to their married name or keep their maiden name. I took to my social media timelines and asked the question:

Did you take your husband’s name when you got married? Why or why not? #marriage #marriedlife

The conversations that came from this question were awesome! I’m going to divide them between the ones who changed their names and the ones that decided they didn’t want to.

I changed my name!

Yes, I did. We discussed it before getting married. He wanted me to take his last name. I have no attachment to my last name as it is my grandfather’s and not my own father’s. So changing was no big deal. Plus I like being able to say we are The ____

I did simply because my maiden name was too long and would often get butchered by everyone.

I did because I am old fashion that way.

When I married I took my maiden name as middle name and my husband’s for my last. Now I have a real simple name. Changed my life!

I did because that was “non-negotiable” for him. I dropped my middle name so I could still have papi’s last name because that was important for me.

I added his last name on to mine to have two last names because I already was established in my career. And I didn’t want to give up my identity.

I took my husband’s last name, but haven’t legally changed it. When I became a Naturalized citizen I dropped my 2-3 Hispanic last name and took my adoptive father’s last name. It such a pain for me because I have so many different last names in all my documents. Very sticky subject with my hubby. I think I have to revisit this to keep our family legacy (mine & my husband’s) alive.

I’m not married but when and if I do get married I’m taking my husbands last name. It’s one of the very few traditional customs I look forward to.

I didn’t change my name!

I didn’t legally, but I do not mind adding it next to my name from time to time. For me it was about identity. My name is part of who I am. Also, i think it’s unfair to ask the woman to change and not the guy.

At the time it was a mix of pressure from my feminist mother and my fear of losing my culture and the root of what it means to be me. It really hurt my husband’s feelings. I’ve never made a big deal about it in public if someone calls me Mrs. — because that’s who I am to some, but not to others. We all are different things to different people. But now, I can’t figure out what the big deal was, and I dearly wish I had just added my husband’s name onto the end of my own name

I kept my name and it wasn’t an issue for either of us. My kids have my husband’s last name, which is good for blogging.

I kept my last name and my children have my husband’s last name. I never had any intention of changing my last name. It’s my name, it’s always been my name and I’m keeping it.

I did not. Honestly I didn’t want to change all my paper work (passport, certificate of naturalization, license) and also professionally I decided it was best. He didn’t mind at all.

Nope I will be married 4 yrs in june and still haven’t done it. At first I was sad to lose mine, then I thought using the dash was too long and then I didn’t want to have to change all my docs. I have been considering the dash though

My answer:

I changed my last name as soon as I got my marriage certificate in the mail. I never had my dad’s last name because of immigration issues. I was the only one born in the US out of my brothers and I, and I was the only one that didn’t have my family last name. I ended up with my mother’s maiden name as my maiden name. My parents re-married when I was 10 (long story) and my they decided that since I was going to one day lose my last name anyway (their words not mine) they didn’t think it was that important to go through all the legal channels of changing my name. I would have hyphenated had my last name been my fathers. But my maiden name and my married name are too close to the point where the signatures are similar so I didn’t bother with the hyphen. And also, I wanted to have the same last name as my kids. That was important to me as well.

What about you? What made you decided whether or not to take your husband’s name when you got married? I’d love to hear your take!