Mami Monday | Maiden name: Did you keep yours?

2013-05-11 20.40.27 As wedding season approaches, I became curious to see if my friends decided to change their name to their married name or keep their maiden name. I took to my social media timelines and asked the question:

Did you take your husband’s name when you got married? Why or why not? #marriage #marriedlife

The conversations that came from this question were awesome! I’m going to divide them between the ones who changed their names and the ones that decided they didn’t want to.

I changed my name!

Yes, I did. We discussed it before getting married. He wanted me to take his last name. I have no attachment to my last name as it is my grandfather’s and not my own father’s. So changing was no big deal. Plus I like being able to say we are The ____

I did simply because my maiden name was too long and would often get butchered by everyone.

I did because I am old fashion that way.

When I married I took my maiden name as middle name and my husband’s for my last. Now I have a real simple name. Changed my life!

I did because that was “non-negotiable” for him. I dropped my middle name so I could still have papi’s last name because that was important for me.

I added his last name on to mine to have two last names because I already was established in my career. And I didn’t want to give up my identity.

I took my husband’s last name, but haven’t legally changed it. When I became a Naturalized citizen I dropped my 2-3 Hispanic last name and took my adoptive father’s last name. It such a pain for me because I have so many different last names in all my documents. Very sticky subject with my hubby. I think I have to revisit this to keep our family legacy (mine & my husband’s) alive.

I’m not married but when and if I do get married I’m taking my husbands last name. It’s one of the very few traditional customs I look forward to.

I didn’t change my name!

I didn’t legally, but I do not mind adding it next to my name from time to time. For me it was about identity. My name is part of who I am. Also, i think it’s unfair to ask the woman to change and not the guy.

At the time it was a mix of pressure from my feminist mother and my fear of losing my culture and the root of what it means to be me. It really hurt my husband’s feelings. I’ve never made a big deal about it in public if someone calls me Mrs. — because that’s who I am to some, but not to others. We all are different things to different people. But now, I can’t figure out what the big deal was, and I dearly wish I had just added my husband’s name onto the end of my own name

I kept my name and it wasn’t an issue for either of us. My kids have my husband’s last name, which is good for blogging.

I kept my last name and my children have my husband’s last name. I never had any intention of changing my last name. It’s my name, it’s always been my name and I’m keeping it.

I did not. Honestly I didn’t want to change all my paper work (passport, certificate of naturalization, license) and also professionally I decided it was best. He didn’t mind at all.

Nope I will be married 4 yrs in june and still haven’t done it. At first I was sad to lose mine, then I thought using the dash was too long and then I didn’t want to have to change all my docs. I have been considering the dash though

My answer:

I changed my last name as soon as I got my marriage certificate in the mail. I never had my dad’s last name because of immigration issues. I was the only one born in the US out of my brothers and I, and I was the only one that didn’t have my family last name. I ended up with my mother’s maiden name as my maiden name. My parents re-married when I was 10 (long story) and my they decided that since I was going to one day lose my last name anyway (their words not mine) they didn’t think it was that important to go through all the legal channels of changing my name. I would have hyphenated had my last name been my fathers. But my maiden name and my married name are too close to the point where the signatures are similar so I didn’t bother with the hyphen. And also, I wanted to have the same last name as my kids. That was important to me as well.

What about you? What made you decided whether or not to take your husband’s name when you got married? I’d love to hear your take!

16 thoughts on “Mami Monday | Maiden name: Did you keep yours?

  1. Interesting question. I did change my last name, for two reasons. First, because I didn’t like my maiden name – Presley. The prank phone calls for Elvis were a pain when I was growing up. More important to me, I wanted to be known as a couple with my husband — traditionalist, yes. BUT more, we are a team (almost 23 years now), and I want to be known to the world as a member of that team!
    Karen Dawkins recently posted..This-n-that

    1. I love that response! “we are a team and I want to be known to the world as a member of that team!” Couldn’t have said it better myself! Thanks for stopping by!

  2. I changed my name mostly because of tradition and because my husband kind of expected it. I have seen the issues some women have when they get divorced and don’t have the same last name as their children and I’m glad I took my husband’s last name! Don’t really want to go through the trouble of proving I’m my children’s mother!

    1. There are so many factors to consider before changing your name. That’s another good one. My husband has a common name and my part time job is basically making sure his credit report is correct. I definitely didn’t want a junior and he understood. 🙂 Thanks for the comment Maria! I do love your initials as well!

    1. That was so sweet! Glad you like your new last name! Thanks for stopping by and joining in the conversation!

  3. At first didnt but after my daughters were born i felt kind of left out since they have my husband last name, so i started to use it 🙂

  4. I knew from the time we decided to become one that I would take his last name. I was never a fan of the name away. My mom married my father and divorced him by time I was 4. She went back to her maiden name and was remarried when I was 10. So I was the only one with a different name. Plus no one could pronounce or spell my maiden name correctly. I took my husband bc it was an honor to become his wife bc we were picked to be together. Firm believer in a higher bringing us together.

  5. I was so excited and proud that Tom was my husband so of course I took his last name. We’re one. I just can’t stand the old fashioned way older people (80+) address cards to us. Mr and Mrs Tom Cleaver. I’m sorry, but I’m not Mrs. Tom Cleaver. LOL At my wedding I made sure we were not introduced as that.

    1. I felt the same way K! I was excited and proud to be Mrs. Correa. And especially since he hates making phone calls, since I call on bills with his name on it, it just makes things more easier for me as his spouse to share his last name. So what were you introduced as at your wedding?

      Thanks for sharing and stopping by!

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